A rose by any other name.

The name that is on my birth certificate is Elizabeth Margaret.  I was named after my Grandmothers.

If you look up Elizabeth in a baby name book, you will see that there are quite a few nicknames associated with it.  Go ahead and do it, I'll wait. . .  I find some strange.  Tibby?  Babette?  What does either of those have to do with Elizabeth?

Most people call me Liz.  Most.

I have a few other nicknames.  Let’s discuss. . .

Sassy – Angry started calling me this soon after we started dating (and still does).  Hmmm. .  . I wonder why?

Dolly – The story goes that Elizabeth was too formal a name for a baby.  Someone said to my Mom or Dad, “She looks like a little doll.” and the name Dolly stuck.  When my Mom was mad at me she never, ever called me Elizabeth.  She’d say “Dolly LastName, just what do you think you are doing?”  Or some such reprimand.  My family still calls me this and I’ve always been introduced to other people by them as Dolly.  Many of my Dad’s friends don’t know that that isn’t my real legal name.

Lizard – Who hasn’t called someone named Elizabeth by Lizard?  One friend calls me that regularly and believe it or not, I like it!  Not everyone can be a Lizard.

Lizilla – Just like Godzilla.  I was given this nickname when I worked with a group of stock traders.  I needed to be a tough bitch to talk to brokers on the stock exchanges.  I’ll be the first to admit that this fits me to a tee (look up tough bitch in the dictionary and you’ll see my picture).  Angry will use this when I'm in a menopausal rage.  It fits.  I’m thinking of getting this on a personalized license plate. 

Lizzie – This handle was also given to me while I was sitting on that trading desk (see Lizilla).  Everyone on the desk got a “y” sound at the end of their name.  Bobby, Stevie, Markey etc.  I don’t like to spell it with a Y so I spell it Lizzie.  The "big boss" at my company still calls me this.

Lizzie Lou – Not related to plain old Lizzie.  Long after our trading desk was removed from the firm, a coworker said she thought I looked like a Lizzie Lou.  Many years later and I’m still not sure what a Lizzie Lou looks like but that’s what she always called me.  Since it’s different and cute, I still use that for some of my screen names on the interwebs.  So, I guess it's only a nickname that I call myself.  Does that count?

No, I don’t get confused by having so many names.  I’ll answer to pretty much anything!

I wanna bitch about something.

As I say in the "About Me" section, I love some good beer or tequila (and wine too).

I don't have a drink every day but when I feel like it, I pop open a beer, pour a glass of wine, or have Angry make me a margarita (he makes a great one!).

Or, we visit our favorite local restaurant’s bar (and all our Facebook Friend bartenders) for Happy Hour.

I'm currently taking an antibiotic.  This antibiotic has a "severe" reaction to alcohol.  It is so severe that I can't even use mouthwash, cough syrup, or perfume.

Read that again. . . I can't put alcohol on. my. skin.

Needless to say, these 7 days that I’m on this medicine (and at least a couple of days after to let it work its way out of my system) suck.  Big time.

Like I said, I don't have a drink every day.  But since I know I can't, I've never wanted needed a beer so badly in my life.

Every time I go into the fridge those beer bottles are staring back at me as if they are daring me to open them.  I swear I heard “triple dog dare” last night as I was shutting the door.  I hate them right now.

Thanks for letting me bitch.  I hope I can survive until next Wednesday.  Wish me luck; I'm going to need it.

Thanks very much.

Thanksgiving is upon us once again.
 

I’m not sure if anyone cares but I'd like to tell you what I’m thankful for.

1.     I’m glad that my parents taught me:  right from wrong, to respect my elders, how to behave in public, how to treat others with respect, how not to judge a book by its cover, how to be honest, and many other things that make me a better person.

2.     I’m thankful that even though my Mom passed away in 1995, I feel like she’s with me every day.  That makes me stick to all the great things she taught me (see #1).

3.     I’m glad that my Dad is still around.  We drive each other insane constantly but I’ve sort of become his guardian since my Step-Mom passed away.  I’m glad for the opportunity to protect him when he needs it (she left him in quite a financial mess so he’s really needed it).

4.     I’m thankful to have great In-laws.  My Mother and Father-in-law treat me like their own daughter.  My Sister and Brother-in-laws are no different than if they’d been born in my family or me in theirs.  It’s nice to have another family to share good and bad times with.

5.     I’m glad that I have a great Step-Brother and a soon to be Step-Sister-in-law.  They are awesome people and so much fun to be with.  I only wish they didn’t live so far away.  I can’t wait to see them get married next year!

6.     I’m thankful that I have pets.  It’s great to be greeted at the door every night by my two goofball cats.  They want to be picked up and held and they want to sit on our laps.  They love us no matter what we look like or how silly we are.

7.     I’m glad that while I’ve been diabetic for 37 years, I’m in good health.  I’ve got healthy kidneys, healthy eyes, and am in great control even though I’m overweight and am not a perfect eater or blood tester.

8.    I’m thankful that I got to go to college for a good education and that I have a job.  That lets me own a car and a house.  I may have too much credit card debt but I can pay my bills and am working to lower that debt.

9.   I’m glad for the friends I have.  They are a joy to talk to, to shop with, to eat out with, to laugh and cry with, and to share old memories with.

10. I’m most thankful for Angry.  As I’ve said before (here and here), I can’t imagine my life without that man.  He’s my rock, my best friend, my life.  While neither of us is perfect, we are perfect for each other.  I’m glad to have had him in my life for 22 years and that we’ve had a very happy and fun filled marriage for 20 of those years.  I love him more than words can say and I look forward to many more years together.

There are many more things that I am thankful for.  I’m just too lazy to spend the day typing them all.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.  Don’t forget to think about what you are thankful for.

I'm going to be RICH!

Or so my fortunes told me.

I love fortune cookies (I've mentioned this before) and had some for a treat at lunch today.

First I read, "New financial resources will soon become available to you." 

I thought, "Yeah, right."

Then I opened the second one and read, "You will inherit a large sum of money."

Whoopee!

I guess I better get busy responding to those e-mail from some foreign country telling me that someone needs to get large sums of money to the US and I'm the only one that can help.  I will get paid handsomely.

They promised!

A major vacation crisis!

Also known as “get the hell over it.”

We were just in Mexico for a week at our favorite resort in Puerto Vallarta.

As our usual routine demanded required worked out, we had breakfast one morning and headed to the pool to relax and enjoy the day.  We got to the pool around 9 am.  Unfortunately, the Pool Bar doesn’t open until 11 am.  Why yes, I was ready for a drink at 9 am.  Don't judge.  Thank God Luckily, they have another bar a few hundred feet away (called the Pub Bar).  We like to start our days with a drink called Dirty Monkey.  It’s basically a shake made with brandy, Kahlua, cream, and bananas.  Quite a lovely way to work up to tequila.

Anyway, on to the crisis.

That particular morning I told Angry that I’d go to the bar to get our drinks when we overheard a couple discussing what they were going to get from the bar.  The woman wanted a Bloody Mary and the guy asked her to get him a mimosa.

She walked to the bar just in front of me.  I arrived and heard this conversation:

Bloody Mary Drinking Woman:  I need a Bloody Mary and a mimosa with lots of champagne and very little orange juice.

Sad Looking Bartender:  I’m sorry, we ran out of champagne and the next shipment should arrive in two or three hours.  I’m so sorry.

BMDW (in a flabbergasted voice):  Well, he certainly won’t drink a Bloody Mary.  What am I going to do? What am I going to do?

SLB:  Looked at her with questioning eyes.  Probably thinking, “Does she want me to answer that?”

BMDW:  Oh boy, I don’t know what he’ll want to drink now.  He wanted a mimosa (her voice steadily increasing to a high pitched whine).  If there’s no champagne, I don’t know what do to.

I wanted to say, “Hey lady, the bar is FILLED will different types of booze.  Brandy, rum, tequila, Kahlua, flavored schnapps, vodka, Galliano, gin, scotch, wine, and beer.  That’s a lot to choose from.  If there’s no champagne, why can’t you find one other thing he’d drink?  Plus, there is a huge list of frou-frou drinks you can order.”  However, I kept my trap shut.

She was so upset that she didn’t know what to say or do.  She stood there looking around in a panic as I ordered my drinks.  Her husband eventually made it to the bar and ordered something as I left.  I didn’t hear what it was though and now I’m curious.

I must say that if Angry asked me for a drink and they didn’t have what he wanted, I know him well enough to pick something else that he’d enjoy.  Obviously this was beyond her grasp.

I went back for another Dirty Money a short while later.  A different woman was at the bar asking for mimosas.

The conversation went like this:

Lady In Need Of Mimosas:  I need three mimosas. - NOTE: I'm not sure why she needed three as she was there alone.  I won't judge.

Hard Working Bartender:  We are out of champagne but should get some in about two hours.

LINOM:  Oh OK, I’ll come back in a couple of minutes then.

HWB:  No, I’ll have some in a couple of hours.  Two hours.

LINOM (quite loudly):  TWO HOURS!!??

HWB:  Si, two hours.  I’m sorry but we ran out and the truck won’t deliver until later.

LINOM:  Oh my GOD, what am I going to drink?

The bartender had the same look as before as if he was thinking, “Do you really want me to answer that?”

As she stood there looking panicked, I ordered my drinks, watched them being made, thanked the bartender, and began walking back to our pool chairs.  Meanwhile, she was still mumbling and grumbling about not knowing what to order.

Gosh, a major champagne crisis!  How terribly awful. 

Get the hell over it people and drink something else.

Must this really be a crisis?