Who ya talking to?

I have a problem.  OK, I have several tons of problems but I'm only going to discuss one at a time.

I talk to myself.  A LOT.
  

ü      If I get interrupted when doing something, I remind myself where I was and what's left to do. 

ü      If I can't remember how to do something, I give myself suggestions. 

ü      If I'm lost, I calm myself by chatting away. 

ü      If I do something wrong (especially at work), I call myself names (dummy, stupid ass, and jerk are just a few). 

ü      If something really cool happens, I cheer about it. 

ü      If my blood sugar is abnormal (high or low), I repeatedly ask myself, "What the hell happened?"  Or, if know what happened, I discuss it and tell myself it won’t happen again.

ü      If I hurt myself (I tend to staple my finger or slam my knee into my desk at work), I swear and complain about how much it hurts. 

ü      When I’m composing a letter (or a blog!) and can’t think of a word or phrase to use, I sound out all sorts of stuff to see what would work.

ü      If I try a new food, drink, or flavor of gum, I comment on it.

ü      If I’m at a store and like something I see on display, I tell myself how “pretty” or “cool” it is.  I might even try to convince myself to buy it.  Can you be an enabler to yourself?

ü      If I’m alone and I burp (or fart for that matter – yes, we girls do that!), I say “Excuse me.”

ü      When I listening to the radio and hear something I agree with or disagree with, I comment.  It’s usually something like, “Ain’t that the truth!” or “You gotta be kidding me!”  Whoops – I guess I’m not really talking to myself in that case, am I?  I’m talking to someone (or should I say something since it’s a radio?).  Maybe that one is allowable?

ü      I say things like, “Time for some more water.” or “I better get to the bathroom before I pee my pants.” all the time.

Now remember, all these things are said out loud and in normal speaking voice (and I have a loud voice).

At work, if I am swearing at myself or calling myself a name, it never fails that someone will walk by my office door.  I often hope they don't think I'm calling them "Jerk" as they are going by! 

I get a lot of strange looks.  I’ve been teased about it (I don’t care) and asked many times, “Do you answer yourself?”

Why yes, I do answer myself.  I usually get the responses I want that way!!